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Subject:King of carrot flowers.
Time:02:46 pm
Whenever I look at somebody who is really thin it makes me jealous.
New people are coming to the ED clinic and they are going to be stick thin.
Why do I feel jealous when I see someone dying,
when I see a holocaust victim?
Ladicious (My eating disorder)
tells me I should be the thinnest in the world.
He says I should be on a tube in bed.
He says I can't get better before I get to 60 pounds.
I try to fight these thoughts.
It is really very hard.
I want to be better.
I want to be better.
I want to have a normal life.
My thoughts scare me.
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87_degrees
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Time:2009-03-07 01:42 pm (UTC)
*Hugs*

Good luck. Recovery is hard but it's worth it. Just try to ignore the bad thoughts and get through each day. It will get easier.
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